Love your kids and believe them when they tell you who they are. I promise you they know better than you do.
Its’s pride month!
3 years ago, that would have meant almost nothing to me but since 2020 when my oldest came out as both pansexual and Genderfluid (more on that later), my Junes are an excuse for me to be “extra cringe”. If you are not my 15-year-old than you might just say supportive… Rainbow flags, Pride social media posts and Pride events. This is the fun part!
It’s not always like this.
Sometimes it’s sobbing hugs.
Sometimes it’s calling the school about bullying knowing you are possibly going to make it worse.
Sometimes it’s cutting out friends and family for not being safe and supportive.
Sometimes it’s crying in the shower about the anti-trans youth legislation that keeps getting passed in states.
Sometimes it’s watching your kid mourn the loss of relationships they have had since first grade.
Sometimes it’s accidently deadnaming your kid and having to see the pain that you caused, in their eyes.
Being the parent of a queer kid can be hard, but you know what’s even harder? Being the queer kid.
My kid is the bravest person I know.
At 14 years old, my kid not only knew who they were, but they declared it to the world and made ZERO apologies. They looked at the people who gave them life and a carefully picked name and a perceived notion of who they would be and said “No, thank you, this does not work for me”. They had the hard conversations with the people they knew were not going to be supportive and they have never looked back.
Pansexual and Genderfluid.
This essentially means my kid refuses to allow themselves to be put into a box. They are attracted to people regardless of gender and they refuse to be bound by a gender in their own life. They saw the “choices” society had to offer and said, “I’ll take all of them” (or none of them, depending on the day).
Like I said, my kid is freaking BRAVE!
Being their parent has changed me, profoundly. It has changed how I am raising them and their younger siblings, it has changed the way I view the world and all the people in it, and it has even started me on my own journey of self-discovery. Being their parent has given me the courage to question everything I ever thought I knew about the world, especially everything I thought I knew about me.
Turns out my kid is not the only queer person in the house.
Love your kids and believe them when they tell you who they are. I promise you they know better than you do.
